When I came to the office this morning, I got a message from Mat that he slept on me last night while chatting. After a while he disappeared and my agitation resurfaced. It was the 4th of July and he was off his USA duties for a change today. He had said that we could meet today. I was looking foward to it like a greedy kid craves for candy. So I casually messaged him myself and we kept chatting back and forth. Later in the afternoon he went quiet on my immersed in his work as usual. I had to sit late today. So I waited and waited until a little over 7:00 PM I messaged him again about what he was upto.
He was working as usual. I had already started weeping in my heart because he had no idea that I was waiting on his word about our meeting. So when he asked me why I was sitting late, I wanted to scream that I was here because of him!!!! I restrained my expression. His answer to my declaration was so couldn't care less that I wept tears while the driver took me home. I blasted on chat. Here I was looking foward to our meeting and here he was as cool as a cucumber, not one word!!!! So I just burst into anger telling him I was very upset because he didnt bother. He told me his car wasn't available until the next 45 min. While that upset me, it didnt anger me at all. What hurt me was his nonchalalnce. The Mat I used to know was never like this. He used to be thoughtful no matter what, and I could sense the sensitivity from a mile. I can't now because its gone. So I ended up lambasted him calling him mean! He went into the "baby" mode with me. While my heart melted, I was extrememly sad at him not making it to our meeting. We chatted late into the night, until he went to sleep at 3:30 ish AM. Our exchange was heatedly amorous. If we had been together, fireworks would have painted the sky in hues of red!
He was working as usual. I had already started weeping in my heart because he had no idea that I was waiting on his word about our meeting. So when he asked me why I was sitting late, I wanted to scream that I was here because of him!!!! I restrained my expression. His answer to my declaration was so couldn't care less that I wept tears while the driver took me home. I blasted on chat. Here I was looking foward to our meeting and here he was as cool as a cucumber, not one word!!!! So I just burst into anger telling him I was very upset because he didnt bother. He told me his car wasn't available until the next 45 min. While that upset me, it didnt anger me at all. What hurt me was his nonchalalnce. The Mat I used to know was never like this. He used to be thoughtful no matter what, and I could sense the sensitivity from a mile. I can't now because its gone. So I ended up lambasted him calling him mean! He went into the "baby" mode with me. While my heart melted, I was extrememly sad at him not making it to our meeting. We chatted late into the night, until he went to sleep at 3:30 ish AM. Our exchange was heatedly amorous. If we had been together, fireworks would have painted the sky in hues of red!
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